nothing but ordinary.

I had quite the weekend, friday was Port Hope prom party. My friend's band was there and everyone was having a great time. I went outside to notice my friend Falon on the ground, crying and went over to see what was wrong.. I then saw my friend Rachel there crying also. I went and leaned over Falon, and some girl, which will remain unnamed full blown attacked me for no reason. In a panic, I threw my water bottle at her, and began to start crying. She continued to pull my hair, throw me to the ground, kick me and punch me in the face. To top it all off, she poured an entire beer on me. I later found out she attacked those two girls as well. Landing one in the hospital. I really do not understand the thrill that girls get when they fight, or how trashy they apparently don't realize that they look. I will never understand. This was the ending to my awful week, I found out a girl I was supposed to live with, completely bailed. I was arguing with my boyfriend and overall just having a really bad week. I went to bed that night, and woke up at 6am to head to work for 7am.
After work, my weekend completely changed, and did nothing but look brighter. I took the Go Train to St.Catherines and went to see my boyfriend. Hands down, the most amazing man I have ever met. As soon as I got there, a rush of happiness overwhelmed me. I could see him sitting in his car, and I couldn't wait to wrap my arms around him.
As we drove around I could do nothing but look at him. I couldn't keep my eyes off him. That night, we had a well needed night in for the both of us. We watched a movie, and during the last few minutes couldn't keep our hands off each other. Enough said. I love sleeping beside him, I love waking up in the middle of the night to have him completely wrapped around me. The next day, we just hung around for a while, drove around then headed to the falls. We went to see a movie, and after that headed back to his house, and laid in bed and just spent time together. Myself and my boyfriend live 2 hours away from each other, but we still seem to make it work making trips to see each other every weekend. Honestly I haven't ever wanted anything more than us to be together ever. I don't ever want to lose him. We haven't been together very long, but it doesn't matter, we love each other and I'll do anything for this boy.

-- Take chances, a lot of them, because honestly no matter where you end up and with whom, it always ends up just the way it should be. Your mistakes make you who you are. You learn and grow with each choice you make. Everything is worth it. Say how you feel, always. Remember, everything happens for a reason.

I obviously believe in fate, and I really do believe that fate brought us together, I am crazy about this boy and I think we were brought together to stay together.

I can't wait to see what's next.

when we party, we party hard.

Since myself and my best friends have started partying, when we party, we party hard. we go all out. hands down.
A couple weeks ago, for May 24 weekend, we decided to take a little trip to St.Catherine's where one of my best friends Sara lives in a house of really amazing girls, that night we managed to get our hands on some crazy things. Some took more than others and out of over twenty of us, maybe ten managed to get out of the house (which by our standards wasn't very good, we usually all at least make it to the bar) At the bar, I ended up with none of the people I came with. I was so sketched out of my mind I was not able to have as much fun as I planned on having. I was getting panicked phone calls from my friends saying two of my best friends went missing, really what I found out they were doing was going on a jungle adventure. Victoria and Sam came back mangled to pieces from falling out of trees and crawling through bushes. In the end, I ended up by myself with my boyfriend and his friend at the bar, alone and drove back to Sara's where everyone was extremely intoxicated, or passed out, a large majority of us didn't even go to sleep. And tonight should be around the same as we are going to Port Hope Prom Party, which is at the same place it was two years ago, and ladies and gentlemen, lets just say it was a shitshow. so
tonight is the night my best friends and I are legendary for getting "outrageous"
outrageous - this word means to be beyond the point of sexy (urban dictionary)
But it also means to get ridiculously fucked up. And we get outrageous, we do it well. So, we shall see how tonight goes.

We are ready for the weekend.

young love.

I have discovered that there is such thing as good guys in this world. It just takes a lot to find them. You can't look in your home town, everyone has had a piece of everyone. You have to go beyond your neighbourhood. Everyone deserves a chance to find true love, or whatever their idea of love is. It is sad to think that in a life time some people are unable to find something even remotely close to love. I have watched my bestfriends over the years have their hearts completely ripped out of their chests and thrown on the floor. It's terrible to think that another person has such power to make someone feel so horrible. I would love to think that everyone will be happy one day with someone else, but it's very unrealistic to think that if they find love now, is it really ever lasting love? In today's society, divorce is prominant. I sometimes think, what is the point of getting married, if the chances of me getting divorced are higher than me actually spending the rest of my life with one person? It's depressing to think about sometimes but I would like to think that there is one person out there for me that will make me completely happy. I think I have found that person. I have learned the past year never to make plans for the future, because evidently you will end up disapointed most of the time. For now on, I have decided to just live for the moment, and at this moment I am happy with this certain person. For now, being around him makes me feel like a million dollars. I couldn't picture myself with anyone else right now. Life is very unpredictable and I have no idea what will happen with us when I head back to Ottawa for school, but as of right now, I am the happiest girl in the world when I'm with him. He is such a change from previous boyfriends. He has more compassion, is very mature and makes me realize how much of an idiot I look like when we're arguing over nothing. Which to be honest, is a a good thing. I would love to make future plans with this boy, but it's silly to do so. We're both still young, and we have a lot ahead of us in the future. We honestly just have to live for the moment, and forget about the future. When the future comes, we will deal with it, but until then we shouldn't worry ourselves.

I'll be up up and away *

The past year I've experienced a lot in my life. I moved my whole life four hours away, left everything behind including my family, boyfriend of the time, and my bestfriends. It was probably the hardest thing I ever did. I landed myself at 85 lbs from the lack of eating and stress that overcame me. Moving to Ottawa for school was probably the most difficult thing I have ever done, it changed my whole world. And once I got there I felt like everything I had ever known completely disapeared. I was so angry with myself and the decisions I had made. I am the type of person who feels like they need other people's input in order to be okay with the decisions I should be making by myself. I didn't chose this school, everyone else chose it for me. At the beginning I thought it was the worst decision I had ever made but in the end it's the best one I could have ever made. Eventually I needed to get out of the nest and move on with my life and post secondary education was the best excuse I had. I needed a change, I just didn't know it yet. I was trapped in a abusive relationship that I couldn't let go of, and moving away slowly ended it, being too far away to make things work was the best thing that we could have said to eachother. I never thought myself and Ottawa would ever get along, at first I didn't make very many friends, and I never went out anywhere. I isolated myself in my room everyday and rarely went to class. This continued for a really long time, until I realized that I was really unhappy with my life, I needed to change. I started going out, I started hanging out with more people, I met some really amazing people that I could never live with. I got close with my roommates, and my life was good. I can say I have fallen in love with Ottawa, it was the best thing for my life. I can't wait to go back.

A very good friend of mine told me this;

"You really can't control anything, something is going to happen , the best we can hope for in life is to try and steer it in a good direction" - m.h.

I thought I could control everything in life and found out I have no control over anything, I am very content with my life right now, I have amazing friends, an amazing boy and right now, that's all that matters to me. In September, I'll have to deal with a whole new school year, I'll try harder, learn more and continue to bring happiness into my life.